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· Recently-bedyked actress Cynthia Nixon's girlfriend has been revealed as Christine Marinoni. We're a little disappointed to see that Christine is exactly as we expected: a sweater vest-wearing education activist. Those predictable Gays! [NYDN]

· We're finding it hard to believe that there's another Paris Hilton sex tape (as reported by the reliable News Of The World), but our precious tabs are running the news of a 12-hour fuckfest nonetheless. Seriously, not even Paris is dumb enough to do this again. Right? McFly? [Page Six, Fleshbot]

· The Olsen legalbots continue to threaten anyone making t-shirts with their name on them. [Page Six]

· Madonna has reportedly invited quasi-newlyweds Britney Spears and Kevin Federline to her British estate for a honeymoon getaway. Can Kevin manage to study Kabbalah while distorting himself into obscure yoga positions without the aid of Red Bull? [The Sun UK]

· Usher and Naomi Campbell are an item? For real? What the hell? [Page Six]