Monday Morning Box Office: Fox Marketing Rules The World
What the hell happened to America's love affair with Tom Hanks?
1. DodgeBall: A True Underdog Story — $30 million
We're pretty sure America doesn't realize what it unleashed by embracing Fox's marketing avalanche. When we woke up this morning and shambled to the bathroom, we found that our scrotum had been branded with an image of Ben Stiller in a handlebar mustache.
2. The Terminal — $18.7 million
Possible DodgeBall tie-in: The DreamWorks marketing department persuades Steven Spielberg to digitally insert Ben Stiller at key emotional moments, where he hilariously slams a red ball into Tom Hanks' testicles.
3. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban — $17.4 million
Possible DodgeBall tie-in: Hermione enters into an inappropriate relationship with Vince Vaughn and is expelled from Hogwarts.
4. Shrek 2 — $13.6 million
Possible DodgeBall tie-in: Red, rubber ogre cocks at Burger King.
5. Garfield: The Movie — $11 million
Possible DodgeBall tie-in: Bill Murray signs to do voice-over for wise-cracking dodgeball in DodgeBall II.