· Carmel driver slams door on Lizzie Grubman's leg. You can book Carmel's drivers online here or call them on (212) 666-6666 to show your appreciation. [NYDN]
· Golddigger alert: Jets owner and Johnson & Johnson heir Woody Johnson is single again. Close your eyes and think of (owning big chunks of) England. [NYP]
· A wise Oscar-announcement-morning warning: "Attention all employees of Miramax! I suggest that your ass calls in sick this morning, cuz Harv is gonna be PISSED!" [Whatevs]
· "There are two kinds of people the ones who want to be in Page Six, and complete liars." [Michael Musto]