1. The funniest ESL teaching exercise/tongue-twister ever.

2. A tragic tale, Othello for the US magazine generation. Well, minus the murder. And all the interracial hotness. So far.

3. A really foul cocktail served in TriBeCa with melon liquer.

4. A horrible mental image of beauty and the directorial beast doing it in a big jumbly pile of severed feet.

5. Some sleazy divorce lawyer and/or publicist's rumor-mongering a way to make Ethan Hawke look more sympathetic in the public eye before initiating proceedings. See also: Intolerable Cruelty, Sweet Smell of Success.