Item One: Dwarves are horny too. Alleged former model Caitlin Baldwin — Wait! Caitlin from 1983's horror/Western B-movie Eyes of Fire? Oh my God, I love her work — evidently totally did that famous dwarf guy, Peter Dinklage. It seems he is a mack daddy.

While I'm intrigued by the prurience of this item, couldn't the little fella have hit on, oh, Mena Suvari, or Roseanne, or Graydon Carter? That'd be a rad story.

Item Two: NYC Schools Chancellor Joel Klein is a man about town: this we knew. As evidence of his partying, Grove pours in any star-studded appearance of Klein's he can name in the last six months. It's a spray of bold-faced names. Pretty sneaky, sis.

Item Three: Spike Lee is a bit of a dick. Go figure.

Item Four: I think it was something about elderly war photographers gathering to do a Spencer Tunick nude photoshoot somewhere upstate. Eep?

Item Five: Grove gets in the fart jokes. Surely he's on the advance list for NY Mag, and ran this to mock the criticism of his fart obsession?

Mr. Grove: you're turning me on, but you're not getting me off.
Lloyd Grove's Lowdown [NY Daily News]