Two columnists commiserate over the (alleged) breakup of Bennifer: "I want you to know I'm doing OK. Seriously. Well, what I mean is I'm trying to cope as best ... I sit slumped in a darkened room, a bottle of Jack Daniel's in one hand, a bigger bottle of Jack Daniel's in the other hand. A pistol on my lap, the stench of Death all around me... oh, wait, check that: not Death, Glow. (I always mix up the name of J.Lo's perfume.)" On the Entertainment Tonight consequences of the breakup: "I fear for Colin Farrell: The pressure is going to be relentless on him now to have even more sex."
At Least Liz Taylor Was a Pro About It [National Post]