· Uma's giant brothers to kick Cheatin' Ethan's ass. Fight proposed for 3:30 p.m., after 8th period, behind the cafeteria. [People News]
· Bennifer may have cancelled their wedding, but nothing can stop the sapphic freight train that is Melissa Etheridge's Malibu wedding this weekend. But back to Ben-Jen: there are reports, it should be noted, that the yucksters were married on the 7th. A violinist claims to have played in their string quartet. Yeah right, like they had a string quartet. [NY Post]
· After an early 70s California earthquake, a broke Arnold Schwarzenegger and friend posed as European bricklayers. While "estimating" repair jobs, they'd damage the houses so they'd actually have something to repair. This experience is not at all dissimilar to the manufacturing of California's energy shortage situation: perhaps Mr. Schwarzenegger is actually uniquely qualified to be California Governor. [Kausfiles]