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In this monster issue: Jimmy Fallon, Tara Subkoff, Justin Timberlake, Jessica Simpson, Julianne Moore, Johnny Knoxville, Andy Rooney, A Baldwin Brother, Shoshanna Loenstein, Hilary Swank, Howard Stern, David Spade, Drea de Matteo, Julie Andrews, Jon Lovitz, Matthew Broderick, Jason Lewis, Owen or maybe Luke Wilson, Ben Taylor, Chris Evert, Steven Spielberg, Joel Grey, Rosie O'Donnell, Mario Cantone, and, last but never least, Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee, together again for the very first time.

· "Jimmy Fallon and blonde female companion, most likely Imitation of Christ designer Tara Subkoff at Gavin "Cokehead" Brown's Passerby Bar. Fallon was blitzed, sweaty and oblivious to my shameless attempts to hit on his girlfriend. An hour later, he tripped over his shoes and nearly faced it getting into a waiting cab." [Ed. Note: I do believe you mean "girlfriend" as in "Hey Girlfriend!" not like "girlfriend." I'm not saying anything... I'm just saying.]

· "Justin Timberlake last night at a table with some buddies. 54th and 3rd St., Houstons restaurant. Table full of dancers (what appeared to be) also full next to him - including that naughty looking baby from his latest video. Thought it was an odd place for him to be dining. Not sure what he ate. No one was bothering the group either."
· "Jessica Simpson acting like a retarded dumbass. Oops, that was on TV."
· "Julianne Moore dining a deux at Pastis with a bearded, very handsome guy. Her husband, perhaps? Table smack against the sidewalk with no one paying much mind until she left. Then all necks craned. She looks very pretty and simple and sweet up close, though hair nowhere near as red as those hair colour ads!"
· "Johnny Knoxville and pals at the Mercer lobby bar... almost ran over Andy Rooney and wife leaving Mercer Kitchen from all the ogling he was doing of two babettes in from Vegas (ended-up sending the gals drinks)."
· "A Baldwin brother at The Park penthouse last night. The young, cute one. (Note: crowd BEYOND cheese at some fancy PR pubah's party there. Shoshanna Loenstein looking bored and disgusted with the entire affair.)"
· "Saw a very pretty Hilary Swank lounging on a bench outside the yarn store Purl in Soho around 6:30 Thursday evening."
· "Howard Stern and David Spade eating at the Mercer Kitchen late last evening. They were there with a whole tableful of people (none other which I recognized). Ran into Howard in the bathroom and said hi. He was supernice."
· "Drea de Matteo on 8th Street walking towards St. Marks talking on her cell phone at 6.30pm 8/21."
· "I saw Julie Andrews eating at Nobu a few days ago with a man about her age and a man and woman who looked around 30. She looked gorgeous and exactly as she does on screen - quite an accomplishment for an older woman! Throughout the meal three little kids came up to her to tell her how much they loved "The Princess Diaries" and ask for a picture with her. She was very gracious, but got a little sick of it by the third child."
· "Having dinner at Joe Allen's tonight [Ed. Note: Your mistake!], Jon Lovitz walks in and takes a table in the back. Five minutes later, Matthew Broderick walks back to join him for a drink. The two then retreat to next door Orso for dinner. After dinner, we go to see Avenue Q and who am I sitting next to but H-O-T Sex and the City actor, Jason Lewis (Think Absolut Vodka) with an un-named blonde. He was much cuter in person but did have a rather annoying laugh."
· "Eating dinner at Voyage on Perry Street (on the site of the long ago but not forgotten International Stud) and Owen (or maybe Luke; they look alike to me) Wilson, was at the table next to us. He was with a guy wearing a brown tee and a woman with a kinda scary white halter top. I was sitting on the same banquette as Owen and didn't notice what he was wearing cause I was too busy noticing how he's really really small in the way that Ed Koch is really really big and he, Owen not Ed, has that movie star big head. Didn't really listen to his conversation except for a bit about how "she's emotionally ten years too old for me". I didn't hear the rest. No really. I had my own conversation to keep up. I use to get fucked over there where that corner table is now."
· "I now live in Bryn Mawr, PA. I was in my local pharmacy, waiting in line for a prescription, and this tall, amazingly good looking guy unknowingly cut in front of me. I was just about to say "I was next" all pissed off, when I noticed how good looking he was. So I opted just to stand there and study him. When he said his name to get his prescription, Ben Taylor, and his address, which is in Martha's Vineyard, I knew who he was. (Son of James Taylor and Carly Simon). I was amazed at how good looking he is, and why no one has ever "exploited" him. He is over 6 feet tall, gorgeous blue eyes, a really strong jaw, and his hair was that perfectly punky fucked up cut which was bleached blond with dark roots. He looked totally real, not like those pseudo cool rockers that are manufactured today. It turns out he was playing at a local cafe with his band."
· "Driving on the FDR southbound around 6:15 Thursday, saw a black Lincoln US Open courtesy car beside me. Chris Evert was in the back seat, yakking on a cell phone. They pulled off at the 96th St. exit."
· "While crossing the intersection of West Broadway and Prince St in SOHO who should pull up in a black Suburban but Steven Spielberg wearing a blue and white striped shirt. The car pulled up to the curb and SS did not emerge during our surveillance. Immediately ran to the Apple store to report."
· "Saw Joel Grey of 'Cabaret' emcee fame walking his little dog in hudson river park on wednesday night around 10:30. He looked sort of old and shriveled, but then again he must be about 70 by now, so he has an excuse." [Ed. Note: You are pure evil. Joel Grey is one of the sweetest men who's ever lived.]
· Wireless stalking: "Rosie O'Donnell at blue smoke. Now."
· "Mario Cantone, of SATC and other things, spotted Thursday night at Barracuda in Chelsea. Sat to the side near the door with three friends- keeping to themselves and far away from the boring drag competition going on at the back of the bar. Looking pretty fit in a tight shirt- was expecting a more flamboyant type and was pleasantly surprised..."
· "My friend was in LA [Ed. Note: Her mistake!] this past Sunday to watch her son compete in the XGames. Good mid-westerner that she is, she claimed her primo seats in VIP tent 4 hours before the start of the event. A few minutes before the skatepark final in walks SPamela Ham-derson, her two brats and Tommy Lee. They ask security to have the midwesterners moved to the BACK- they want to sit up front. My friend promptly refuses. They get more security. More refusals to move. The friend indignantly plays the Ma Joad card to the ESPN people: "I spent my life savings to see my son compete in his first XGames and you're telling me I'm not important enough to sit here! If they wanted these seats, they should have gotten here at 9 in the morning, like I did." If anyone watched the XGames broadcast and noticed a scowling Pamela and Tommy.....that's the reason why."