· 60-year-old "four-time loser" Geraldo Rivera is now married again, this time to a 28-year-old former assistant. Every day, perfectly ordinary women go insane and marry men like him, to the horror of their parents — just ask Kurt Vonnegut, former father-in-law of Mr. Rivera. [NY Post]
· What if the Governator loses the race for California? Shriver will dump him like a sack of steroid-fatigued potatoes, some predict. "Kennedys need power like a heroin addict needs a fix." [Cindy Adams]
· Toronto resident and New York Poster Child for Tourist-Victims Lili Sun came back to New York last week. On her first visit this month, she was brutally attacked by a bottle-swinging wacko. On her return trip, she was getting some free orthodontia for injuries sustained during her assault... until the power went out mid-treatment. And you thought your blackout sucked. [Daily News]
· Bill Reilly, conservative Fox News talk-show host famous for shouting down and threatening a man who lost his father in the World Trade Center attacks, has written a thriller. We hear he will next work on a catty, thinly-disguised roman-a-clef, "Roger Ailes wears Sansabelt." [NY Post]
· Joe Conason's "Big Lies: The Right-Wing Propaganda Machine and How It Distorts the Truth" accuses Ann Coulter of being a faghag. Uh, shocker. [Daily News]