We've been busted. Regarding the Jason Oliver Nixon item below, a reader points out that Us Weekly killed its "Scene and Heard" section some time ago and it was never written by a senior-level staffer anyway. Evidently neither we nor Page Six read Us Weekly regularly enough (or at all, really) to know this.

In my defense, I've been putting this week's copy to good use as a bookmark when reading Vogue. It's slim enough that it fits nicely between the much-thicker Vogue's ad-filled pages. [Ed. note It also makes a nice cocktail coaster. Very absorbent.]

I just find reading Us Weekly a little daunting. I tend to get completely overstimulated when presented with that many images and exclamation marks. (I had an epileptic seizure once when I was six, and I don't want it to happen again.)