· The Generic Big Bash
 Paul Oakenfold at Capitale.
Given that the guest list is determined entirely by the "guest's" ability and willingness to pay the $200.00 per person entrance fee, we're guessing that Capitale regulars P. Diddy and Heidi Klum probably won't be there this time. But if you must do the club scene for New Year's (and everyone has to do it oncealbeit preferrably between the ages of 22 and 25), Capitale's as good a place as any. For that meager sum, you get champagne, pretty people in black tie, and a big-name DJ. Of course, if you're doing the club thing, all you really need is the champagne. Expect to be surrounded by junior M&A analysts, assorted trustafarians, and the occasional Jersey mobster. [NY Post]

· The Post-Punk
Ex-Pat-aganza
 Gogol Bordello at the Knitting Factory
If you're looking for something a little unconventional, Ukrainian gypsy punk cabaret should do the trick. If you had been in the main performance hall around 1 or 2 AM the last time they played the Knitting Factory, you would have noticed a battered microphone among the empty beer bottles littering the stage floor. An hour or two prior, this poor defenseless piece of technology was being pounded on a red fire pail, slammed against Zildjian cymbals, and screamed into by a sweaty mustachioed Ukrainian channelling the ghost of Sid Vicious. Gogol Bordello opened the last show with a tuba solo by a guy in a pith helmet and a t-shirt emblazoned with the words "Fucking Revolution," and by mid-act, the stage platform was overflowing with belly dancers, and cabaret girls in mock-military uniforms banging bass drums. Not for the faint of heart. Or eardrum. Expect to be surrounded by a motley assortment of appropriately apathetic hipsters, Eastern European ex-pats, and heavy metal polka aficionados. [Flavorpill]

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· The Hedonist's Ball
 Motherfucker New Year's Eve late night bash at Discotheque. For the truly hardcore, the debauchery starts at 2AM and ends at 8AM. Leave the Manolos. Bring the red vinyl go-go boots. Expect to be surrounded by half of Williamsburg and two-thirds of the Village Voice staff. [CitySearch]

· The Sophisticate's Soiree
 Dinner and cabaret at Daniel. Listen to Christine Andreas over an exquisite three-course meal in the Bellecour Room. Leave the S-class. Bring the Bentley. Expect to be surrounded by your fellow mid-level i-bankers, fashionably emaciated women in this year's Herrera or vintage Valentino, a little old money, a lot of new, and an unmistakeable cloud of collective bitterness at not being invited to Camp David or Brooke Astor's for the occasion, like your bosses were. [CitySearch]