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Disney CEO Michael Eisner is taking a page from the presidential handbook on crisis management: When things aren't looking so good, send the troops to a place ill-equipped to resist an invasion. Eisner has unleashed his army of 700 lbs, celebrity-designed Mickeys to conquer Chicago. Once they've run roughshod over the Windy City, be prepared for the disturbing photos of hideously tacky mice gleefully torturing the captured, improv-happy members of Second City. Look, this Mickey's already learned the thumbs-up!